JORGE RODRIGUES SIMAO

A scorpion, who wants to get across a pond, spots a friendly frog. The scorpion says to the frog, "How about a lift to the other side of the pond? I can't swim and I would appreciate your helping me out." The frog replies, "No way. I know what scorpions are like. You promised not to sting me one time in the past when I gave you a lift.  Yet you didn't keep your commitment and stung me. I almost died. This time you'll probably sting me halfway across the pond, from where I won't be able to swim to shore. I don't want to drown." The scorpion counters, "Don't be silly. If I am on your back, I am dependent on you to get across the pond. If I sting you, I will drown too.

It is unfortunate that so many people in our society accept blaming others and making excuses as valid tools to explain their shortcomings and predicaments in their lives. In fact, people fall in love with their excuses for why they are stuck in their present positions and why they are getting nowhere in life. Although many people actually believe their own excuses, these individuals don't realize that most excuses serve absolutely no valuable purpose. Excuses are lies, false statements deliberately presented as being true, meant to deceive others and the excuse-makers themselves.

As is to be expected, a large majority of individuals on this planet see themselves as a lot less selfish than the average individual. Upon dose scrutiny, however, this doesn't make much sense. Provided it was possible to measure selfishness, about half of the people would be more selfish than the average person, and about half of the people would be less selfish. The point is, it is to be impossible for a large majority to be less selfish than the average person. There is no need to measure selfishness, however. Truth be known, everyone in this world – including you and me - is selfish.

According to a Zen proverb, "If you understand, things are just as they are; if you do not understand, things are just as they are." Reality, in other words, is the way it is, regardless of how much or how little we understand about life. One of the biggest barriers that will hold us back in this world is the big difference between what life is and what we think life ought to be. To be sure, false expectations about the world can be paralyzing to our human psyche. The majority of people spend way too much time idealizing how things ought to be - and way too little time observing and accepting how things really are.